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Are you one of those people who has a hard time buying Christmas presents? Do you find yourself wrapping candles for the same people year in, year out?

Whether it’s for a friend, a partner or even a family member, a sex toy is never a bad shout for a Christmas present! We’ve got something for everyone, no matter who you’re buying for. Here’s our Christmas sex toy cheat sheet:

1. Your friend who’s never owned a sex toy 

The Situation:

Your friend let slip during a game of ‘never have I ever’ that they’ve never owned a sex toy. You’ve had a conversation about it and you know they’re keen, they’re just nervous to buy one themselves. This could be your chance to initiate them into the world of silicone.

The Toy: The Classic

The Classic is a great, straight-forward starter sex toy. Its various speeds mean your friend will be able to start slow and find the right vibration intensity to suit them. It’s designed for insertion so couple it up with some lube to give them a real treat.

2. The Couple

The Situation:

Your friends are so much of a couple that you’ve started to think of them as one person, which means you’re only getting them one present. Last year you got them a voucher for tea for two, but so did three of your other friends, so this year you’re looking for something a bit different.

The Toy: The Wand

The Wand is the ultimate “toy for two”. It’s designed to deliver high power clitoral orgasms but you can use it anywhere on your body for a satisfying massage, erotic or not. The long handle makes it a winner when you’re switching up positions, especially if one of you is on your hands and knees. I’d take a toy for two over tea for two any day.

3. The one who never has any free time

The Situation:

You haven’t seen your friend properly in months, and when you do it’s a flying visit between a parent-teacher meeting and a hot yoga class. If you haven’t seen them in decades, you’re prepared to hazard a guess that their masturbation schedule has also fallen by the wayside. As a friend, it’s your job to rectify this.

The Toy: The Bullet

There is no better toy for a person in a rush. The bullet is tiny, quiet and high-intensity. Your friend can slip it in their bag and take it out when they’ve got a quiet moment to themselves.

4. Your newly single friend

The Situation:

Your friend has just been through a break up. Ordinarily, they would have been a beneficiary of your ‘tea for two’ programme but now you’ve got to get creative. You’re also getting tired of their moping so you decide to kill two birds with one stone.

The Toy: The Rabbit

The Rabbit is an all-round people pleaser.  It’s classy, it’s sleek, it’s sexy, and it does everything your friend’s been missing since the breakup. A bit of lube will go a long way.

5. The friend who’s already swimming in sex toys

The Situation:

We’ve all got that one friend who really knows their handcuffs from their hogties. You know you want to get them a sex toy, you just don’t know what on earth you can buy them that they haven’t already bought for themselves.

The toy: The G-Spot

The G-Spot is a bit of a beast, and we’re pretty sure your friend is going to appreciate its seven vibration settings and its deceptively cute curves. The G-Spot is the kind of sex toy you wake up next to in the morning feeling fully satisfied, and maybe even ready for round two…

And if you’ve made it to the bottom of this list but you’re still resisting the temptation to buy everyone a candle for Christmas, chuck one in any way – it’ll set the mood.

Written by: Jess Bolton

Jess Bolton is a writer and self-proclaimed sex toy enthusiast on a mission to demystify good sex. Her method? Talking detail about the ins and outs of sex and sexuality, without shying away from the icky stuff. When she’s not making her mum cringe you’ll find her munching hash browns or flying her drone in Victoria park.
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